__``!~SoUnD oF mY hEaRt~*``_

Monday, July 07, 2008

hav been working very hard these few weeks!
my probation has ended and i'm officially a permanent staff.
doing research, admin and many duties...
onli a diploma can't get me further in my career now.
im stuck in my workplace.
no promotion or pay rise for me.
the minimum qualification shd b ard first class honours or master.
i cldn't get into local uni.
some ppl asked me to hang onto my dream
whereas some hav asked me to change tracks
before time runs out.
im quite lost nw.
my boss wants me to giv her an ans by tis fri.
stay or not to stay?
haiz~
i tried to borrow money fr my aunt for
my degree studies in private local uni
but she seemed reluctant.
the amt is ard 30k dollars.
i can understand y she didn't want to help me.
i dun hav any savings in my bank
cos i need to support my family.
i realli need financial assistance to further my studies.
i wanted to b a medical doctor/forensic scientist
but my dream seems to go further n further away.
perhaps it's not planned by God.
i want a job tt can allow me to interact n serve ppl!
tot of goin for international tourism and hospitality degree
from MDIS.
meeting the course consultant tis wed nite.
dunno wad's the outcome will be...
tears were goin to roll down my cheeks
when i knew my aunt wld reject my request.
it was tt divine timing...daniel called me up.
he's wif fiona, having luxurious dinner at vivo.
he said very encouraging words to me
n asked me not to giv up my dreams
even though he didn't know i was crying cos of it.
i simply do not hav much talents or gifts like others.
im jus a simple girl wif simple faith n trust in people n God.
i dunno wad else i can do or excel in.
i do not know wad's my passion is now.
where m i heading to?
seriously, i had no idea.
thank you so much, daniel
for always being so so so encouraging!
i hope ur dreams will come true too!
jus went for dinner wif my sec sch clique.
seldom meet up wif them
but i was quite happy to c them.
after dinner, we went to ivan's hdb hse to slack.
had some orange vodka n played some games.
forfeit was to drink vodka mixer.
mh gt a lil drunk. he had accidents of pouring water on floor.
diaoz~
the rest of them were red in face.
i was a lil tire after drinking so didn't talk much.
we saw a few pics of ivan's childhood.
haha! i saw ruifong! she's ivan n meifang's ex-classmate!
she nv change much after 13 yrs!
den zzp n i sent saw hui home.
after tt, zzp was so gentlemen to send me back hm
even though i lived far away from them.
thank him so much!
saw hui n i oso discovered great secret of zzp's.
hahahz~
well, i wun post it here.
i watched many movies recently.
i cld say tt all were so nice!
10 promises to my dog made me cry n laugh so much!
watched wif dee n carmen.
tot of jabez too.
jabez's always so adorable.
if onli i cld afford a big hse,
i cld let jabez stay wif me.
so sorry tt i cldn't giv him much.
but im glad tt he's found great owners!
oso shared my troubles wif carmen n dee...
despite of finances, i was oso troubled by comments of ppl.
i dunno y someone cld say or do things like tat.
i was angry n to remove my anger,
i simply jus shut my ears n mouth.
i didn't want to talk or look at tt person.
i didn't want to stand near him.
i dunno his motives or mayb he's someone who talks without brains.
but to me, he isn't someone like tis.
i dunno y.
is he jealous cos he tot tt im snatching things away from him?
to say the truth,
i m not!
he's got his own gain.
im happy for him
but y he wld say sth insulting or hurting to me.
doesn't he know it?
brainless?
or is he disliking me all the way?
tt's y things turn out to b like tis.
wadeva, i shdn't tink too much of it.
i tink God's realli speaking lots to me these days.
even for ytd's svc.
I believe I can fly!
I believe I can touch the sky!

<`scribbled at-
1:23 AM